Breath of Life 

Happiness, why could not I find you?
I have struggled all my life to find you,
 
And until today…
I  do not know where you are.
 

You have a beautiful name,
Tender and caring,
As if speaking of love and of giving happiness
To whomever you meet in life.
 Happiness… I need to find you.
 

I know you are always present in great emotions.
I know you are also present in all the simple things of life.
But why Happiness, if I know where you are,
And even though I really want you, I can not find you?
 

So often I feel you near me Happiness,
But suddenly, 
 As a crystal that shatters into splinters,
 I see you disappearing in particles of infinite sorrow.
 

In front of you giant obstacles, intruders,
Do not let me be close to you. 
Disillusion, anguish, and the pain of missing someone,
Take me always far away from you.
 

Happiness… who knows one day
I will not need to search for you any more.
 

You, that have a beautiful name, tender and caring,
As if speaking of love and of giving happiness
To whomever you meet in life… you Happiness, you will find me,
And will give me the peace that I have looked for…
 

AT THE MOMENT OF MY DEATH

At home.London, January 1990
MARIA LUCIA DA COSTA

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